My focus is life as a highly sensitive person trying to live in a world where sensitivity and respect for others has taken a holiday. I have JUST come to terms with my condition that I have struggled with most of my life. When I mean JUST, I mean today. Wow! I am kind of middle-aged, so you can appreciate the denial I have been living in for decades. (May I say, I look pretty good for my middle-age, or as I like to refer to it my middle-essence.)
It's not all bad; however, one of the traits is that HSP's are creative and have a rich inner life. The down-side is my rich inner life, doesn't take me to dinner. It's afraid of spending any money, so we eat in most of the time.
To give you a little history, I have been a musician most of my life. Starting playing music at eight. Starting performing in public at 15. Looking back I can see how stressful all of that was for me at a young age. It's was my mother's desire for me to pull out of my shyness. She thought if I played an instrument that would make me stand out get attention from my peers. What she didn't understand was I didn't want to play an instrument. I wanted to learn to draw and paint, but no one asked, so I followed her dream for me. That thing about me standing out from the crowd and getting attention from my peers, well, it was the 70's and the instrument she chose for me was the organ. Yes indeed! I did get a lot of attention from my peers, or should I say ridiculed, made fun of, butt of lots of organ jokes. Yes, I have wonderful memories. When my friends were going to the dances, I was playing old music to old people. I was a teenager playing Begin the Beguine. when the Beatles were singing "She Loves You Yea Yea!" Good Times!
However, the good news is I am still making money playing music in a time when people are losing their homes and struggling to survive. Ironic isn't it. More about that later.
I stared this blog because I am tired of apologizing for my sensitivity. It is difficult working within a system that is void of sensitivity. I want to find a good fit for myself. An opportunity that utilizes my talents. I care about people wish I could find job that values my sensitivity.
I am project oriented and work well under those conditions. So, I have had many successes. But, I know that I am in the minority. Only 20% of the population are classified as HSP's. That is around 5 million or so, that's a lot, but right now I living in a very conservative community and have only a few people around me who feel and think the way I do.
I have spent the last 5 years taking care of my ailing mother. That should be a good thing right? Well, now that whole ordeal is over, I am struggling to integrate back into a world that doesn't understand taking time out of your career and personal life to help someone else.
Anyway, I want to hear from you. Are you an HSP? Struggling with the same or similar issues?.
I want to hear your story.
Prologue: I wrote this entry 4 years ago. Just so you know, my situation has improved since those difficult days. I have a job, I have a great boss (who appreciates my sensitivity), I own my house, and my dog is still with me. She is sleeping now, because she is medicated. :)
Prologue: I wrote this entry 4 years ago. Just so you know, my situation has improved since those difficult days. I have a job, I have a great boss (who appreciates my sensitivity), I own my house, and my dog is still with me. She is sleeping now, because she is medicated. :)
